An excerpt from my wedding vows:
“Like I always do, I couldn’t help but write these words on my hand on our wedding day – “ALWAYS MORE.” Our wedding is about far MORE than a day in a dress, it’s about you and me becoming one, by the powerful grace of God. It’s a picture of the love that Christ has for us. I hope that our love could forever reflect that image. The image of Christ’s undeniable love for all of us. But I also write these words on my hand as a reminder that by Christ’s strength, there are always MORE ways that I can serve you, MORE things that I can learn about you, MORE grace to grant you, MORE humility to have towards you, MORE support to offer you, MORE laughter to share with you, MORE children to give you, MORE adventure to seek with you, MORE passion to share with you, MORE faith to have in you, MORE places to go with you, MORE people to meet with you, MORE prayers to pray with you, MORE ways to worship with you, and MORE love to give to you.” – Audrey Roloff
Many of you probably already know this, but I have a lifestyle blog called AUJ POJ that I started when I was a freshman in college. The tagline for my blog is, “a hodgepodge of life.” And that is truly what it is, a hodgepodge of faith, fashion, running, barre3, food, relationships, thoughts, travel, and life. However, the one consistent theme threaded throughout my writings is my life mantra – #alwaysmore
The heart behind AUJ POJ is to encourage women to ALWAYS believe in the MORE that is within them through Christ. “Always more,” is based on the verse in Ephesians 3:20, “Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine…”
I was a distance runner in high school and college, and these words, “always more,” started out as a motivational reminder that I would write in thick black sharpie on my arm before my races. These words reminded me that no matter how tired I was, through Christ’s power within me, I always had more in me, than my body led me to believe.
Over time, these words become more than just a motivational running reminder, they became my life mantra. These words remind me that there is ALWAYS MORE to look forward to, MORE than meets the eye, MORE to someone’s story, MORE to be thankful for, MORE to give, MORE to unearth, MORE to learn, MORE fun to be had, MORE blessings to receive, MORE kindness to offer, MORE fruit to bear, MORE growth in faith, MORE peace to experience, MORE mercy to grant, MORE wisdom to gain, and MORE reason to love.
The meaning behind ALWAYS MORE is part of the reason why we named this blog Beating50Percent. Beating50Percent is about inspiring and encouraging couples to have better than average marriages, and to give MORE than 50% to their spouses. We hope that as you read our posts, you would be relentlessly compelled to give more, serve more, learn more, play more, seek more, and love more, always more, in your marriage.
8 Ways To Have An ALWAYS MORE mindset in your marriage:
ALWAYS SEEK MORE
A quote that daily inspires our relationship and love for one another is, “To find and still seek, now that is love.” We need to keep seeking our spouses, to keep pursuing them, and to keep learning how to love them better. Our pursuit shouldn’t end when we say, “I do.” If we are going to have better than average marriages, we need to view our marriage as a never ending love story. One of the beautiful things about marriage, is that we don’t have to impress our spouse (like when we were dating), but we get to impress our spouse by “still seeking” them. SEEK your spouse MORE with the years, not less.
ALWAYS PLAY MORE
Over the past few years, I’ve watched so many relationships move from the dating/engagement phase, to the married phase. I remember what these relationships were like when they were dating… but they are so different now that they are married. I think this is largely because so many couples get married, and then they stop dating, stop flirting, stop laughing, and stop playing! If that’s you, stop it right now! Yes, it’s easy to get so focused on the tyranny of the urgent, the looming decisions, and the jam-packed schedules, but we can’t let those thing rob us of play dates. Remember when you were a kid and you parents would schedule play dates for you? That’s what we need to do ourselves, for our marriage. Schedule a date with your spouse to just play, laugh, and enjoy doing something you love together. Money, kids, big decisions, dark pasts, and scheduling should be OFF LIMITS. The enemy wants to steal all the fun, laughter, and joy out of our marriages. We must not let him. Make time to PLAY MORE. Ecclesiastes 3:2 “There is a right time to cry and another to laugh.” Make time to play, laugh, and enjoy each other.”
ALWAYS SERVE MORE
The whole, “If you do this, I will do that” attitude towards your spouse has the potential to ruin your marriage. It’s not the way God designed it to be. Healthy relationships are marked by two givers, serving one another with grace, compassion, knowledge, and love. God didn’t say to treat your spouse with respect and serve them only if they do so in return… That’s conditional love. We are called to love our spouses by serving them with humility. Galatians 5:13 says, “You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh ; rather,serve one another humbly in love.”
ALWAYS LEARN MORE
Be a student of your spouse. There is always MORE to LEARN about who they are, what they like, their past, their day-today, their struggles, their triumphs, their fears, and their hopes and dreams. Ask questions. Be curious. Don’t stop getting to know your spouse. On your 10-year wedding anniversary, your spouse will probably not be the same person that you stood before when you said, “I do.” But this should be something that excites you! We should be eager to unveil the new version of our spouse each year. In regards to loving our spouses, 1 Peter 3:7 says that we are to, “dwell with them according to knowledge.” Other versions say that we are to “love them according to knowledge.” In order to have that knowledge, we must be willing to keep learning more.
ALWAYS DREAM MORE
Oh how I hope you dream big dreams with your spouse. Yes, hold them loosely, but don’t be afraid to pray big prayers! Trust in a God who desires to give us good gifts. Marriage is one of the greatest gifts He has given us, and He created it to be good (Genesis 2:8). Set high hopes for your marriage and be confident that the Lord wants your marriage to thrive. The verse that inspired “always more” is in Ephesians 3:20, “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work in us.” His power is at work in your marriage, and He wants your marriage to be immeasurably more than you could ever ask or imagine.
ALWAYS SHARE MORE
If your husband loves something, there must be something to love about it. And vice versa. The more you share in the love of people, places, and things, the more you deepen your oneness. So if your husband loves football, try learning the game. If he loves to rock climb, let him teach you! We have found a deepened oneness and a strengthened bond of love through the power of sharing!
ALWAYS GIVE MORE
To receive the fullness of joy that comes with the covenant of marriage, we must be willing to give ourselves fully to the commitment of marriage. We must give ourselves more fully to our spouses (Ephesians 5:24, 1 Peter 3:7) Matthew 19:5 says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” Becoming one requires you to give all of yourself to your spouse. GIVE MORE to your husband or wife so that your intimacy will grow, your love will deepen, and your marriage will thrive.
ALWAYS LOVE MORE
John 13:34-35 says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” Your love for your spouse is how others will see Christ in you (Ephesians 5:33). Marriage is God’s billboard for the gospel. We live in a time where most people rebuke or neglect Jesus and His teachings. I wonder how much of this is a result of the increasing ugliness of Christian marriages. As you grow to love Christ more, you are able to love your spouse more. It is only by his unending love, that we have the capacity to love without bounds. To love your husband or wife more, you must seek to LOVE Christ MORE. 1John 4:7-8 “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
– Audrey Roloff
You can read more about ALWAYS MORE >> HERE<<
Check out my clothing line inspired by “ALWAYS MORE,” launching this, Sunday, June 26th on www.aujpojshop.com!
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