How Do I Bring God Into My Marriage?
What does that even mean, to bring God into your marriage? Does God need a formal invitation to peek into the personal parts of our life? Do we need to invite God into our school as well? What about our work, or sitting in traffic, or our sex life? Have we invited God to church, or is it assumed that He is already there?
Okay, maybe I totally over exaggerated the question, I apologize. But I think it is dangerously close to misinterpreting how we bring God into our marriage.
This question gets asked a lot. And before I dive in, I want to say that I assume this question is being asked by followers of Jesus, Christians who have accepted Christ, but want more of Him. Specifically, more of Him in their marriage.
The question is, how do I bring God into my marriage? We’ll get to answering that in a moment.
When we ask the question “how do I bring God into my….” you fill in the blank. I imagine Him chuckling with a graceful smile that implies, “oh child, I am already there!” But at the same time, He delights in our asking and our desire to let him transform all of our life.
If you have accepted Christ as your Lord and savior, then He is already in your life. And if He is in your life, that means He is in your marriage, your walk to the coffee shop, your class, your church, your work, your thoughts, etc. He is not more present in church, than in your marriage. He is equally present. If we feel like we need more of Him in our marriage, we probably just need more of Him in general. Wanting more of God in our marriage, just means wanting more of God in general, in all aspects of our life. God doesn’t compartmentalize our lives like we do. We are either living under the full authority of Jesus, (all of our life) or we are not. If Jesus were to be asked, “how is your spiritual life?”, I think He would be confused. I imagine him replying with, “You mean my life?” The point here is, no compartments. Life under Christ is simply just that, life under Christ, and all of it.
“God doesn’t compartmentalize our life, we do” – Jeremy Roloff
Now, don’t get me wrong! There are plenty of ways, techniques, and lifestyle habits we can implement, to prioritize and include God in marriage. Audrey and I have adopted four ways to intentionally invite God into our marriage. To “braidit” as we call it.
4 Ways Audrey And I Prioritize Jesus In Our Relationship.
1. We Pray Before Every Meal
Before every meal I bless the food. This allows us to give thanks and acknowledge that what we have is not ours, it has been given to us. We have been “graced” with food to eat, the resources to buy food and ability prepare it. Giving thanks is one way that we can heighten our awareness of God’s presence and goodness. By giving thanks before a meal, we invite God to the table. Whether it be at home privately, or in a restaurant publicly, we are choosing to praise and thank Him. Sometimes when Auj and I bring God to our dinner date, it invites others to see God. There have been a few times where the couple next to us came up to us after dinner and acknowledged that they saw us pray, which resulted in a divine appointment with someone new. Boom, God in your marriage.
2. We Read The Bible
How you read the Bible, whether it be together or separately is a decision you need to make as a marriage couple. I personally believe we do need time alone in the word, and to include my wife at times is awesome, but not necessary (my personal stance). This is not to say we never read the Bible together. There have been times when we choose to go through a study or section of the scriptures together, but this is not a daily occurrence in our marriage. I believe that God has the beautiful ability to change and shape us when we sit in His presence daily, and wrestle through the word. Sometimes bringing God into our marriage simply means pursing Jesus as an individual and bending your ways to His will. Boom. God in your marriage.
3. We Discuss The Mission And Purpose Of Our Marriage
The Bible is pretty clear that all healthy relationships are working towards something. Immediately after God created Humans (Gen1v26) He gave the married couple, Adam and Eve, a task. (Gen1v28) Their task was to be fruitful and multiply, the other was to have dominion over/to rule over the earth. There we have it, their marriage had a purpose that was not the marriage itself. They had a mission to complete, a unified direction of movement in which both were headed. So, how do God’s commands to Adam and Eve relate to us in 2016? Well, I am in NO position to dive into that historic theological debate. However, I am inclined to say that He gave them a mission or task. Something to be working towards. I think the point is, we need to be in communication about where our marriage is headed, and what it’s for. Open dialogue with your spouse, and counsel with God through prayer, will make your marriage a means to an end, not the end itself. Boom. God in your marriage.
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4. We Desire To Live Under The Authority Of Jesus
My wife and I want to live under the authority of Jesus, that is our desire. We are not naturally good at it, and we mess up ALL the time. We have learned that the key to bringing Christ into your marriage is to seek Christ relentlessly, and ACT on what we learn. And we all know how hard and difficult that is! What I am getting at here is, when Auj and I feel like we need more of God in our relationship, that is simply a road sign telling us our priorities might be mixed up, but our hearts are still right. The desire for more of Christ in our relationship is evidence of a heart longing to love well. One way that we realign our priorities is by re-centering on our purpose, and on the life of Jesus. Boom. God in your marriage.
To wrap it up:
• We ask this question because we all have a deep desire to know God and let his love, freedom and joy fill our lives. We know it’s in our DNA to desire God, so to want more of him is obviously a great thing! That means we are craving His presence.
• To need more of God in a certain area of our life, might mean we just need more of Him in general.
• If we are a follower of Jesus and honor the Bible like Jesus did. We already have God, and we have all of him. He cannot love us any more or less than He does right now.
• There are many ways to open your life to Jesus. Getting more of Him is building your relationship with Him. Just like you do with your spouse.
• God is in your marriage, as much as He is in your life.
Stay encouraged friends! Let’s keep pursuing Jesus and build marriages that far surpass average!
– Jeremy Roloff